Hopeful

Frijords paw, the blind leader puppy dog that my nephew Joshua is training to be a guide dog. I took a shot of just his paw, because during the week I stayed at my brothers house, Frijord sat by my legs. I thought, he was born to be a guide dog. I also wanted to test my camera out, see how close of a short I can get, got one of his nose too, like the paw one better. Somehow, a close shot of his nose, doesn't seem to sit well with me.
I am on day two of being home, though home wasn't necessarily where I was at today. I went to the Cardiologist for a checkup, almost two years ago, I was diagnosis with CHF (congestive heart failure). The doctors at Legacy hospital didn't know how else to diagnosis me, so they gave me that label, without explanation. What I thought I knew about CHF today flew out the window and I got a new knowledge that I am thankful for. I am thankful that it isn't my heart, but a form of sleep apnea, and I am soon to be tested. My first battery of tests will be on January 20th, and Thursday, after fasting for 12 hours, a slew of blood work will get done too. They also, think that I developed asthma in my adult life, which I was unaware was possible. I am more hopeful with these two new specialists, who seem to care for their patients. My knees hurt, the pain is manageable with the Ibrupfen, though I am hoping not to live on that stuff for the rest of my life. I am walking with the crutches, finally learned how to use them. They are awkward at first, but with time and practice, I am able to use them to help me get around. While at the doctors office, I discovered that I lost 15 pounds, which doesn't seem to surprise me all that much. My appetite's not been the same since this ordeal over a week ago, the pain, new environment, and new things have gotten me into some sort of loop. I know that change, taking care of yourself, through spirit, body, and mind is important, yet, it's so hard to make that commitment to myself. I am committed.